Somatic Slow Living for Single Moms: Living a Life You Love

Somatic slow living for single moms is a specific kind of freedom that comes from the decision to step back, step away, and set yourself apart.

Since the day my marriage imploded, I have fought to remain relevant in my old life. Every decision I made for the first two years following my separation and subsequent divorce, was rooted in maintaining the image, clinging to the people I’d known, and offering my kids something familiar when most of what they’d had had been ripped away.

I assumed that if I could bridge the gap between who we were as a family and who we are now, by keeping everything else the same, then we’d all be okay.

The thing is, nothing else was the same. People change, lives go on, and decisions rooted in fear will have you compromising yourself in ways that the healed version of you would never stand for. So desperate was I to repair what had broken, I didn’t bother to think about the quality of the life I had in my grip.

I remember the exact moment I was done. There wasn’t sadness nor anger nor fear… just a simple resolve to cultivate a life I loved. It was a quiet revelation in my heart, a gentle but steady knowing that the race was over, I’d come to the end of that particular road. It was time to retreat, regroup, and reclaim my life. For me, for my kids, and for our future.

At the time I called it wintering. But wintering is seasonal. This was a radical lifestyle switch up. A bold statement. An intentional move to design the life I wanted for my kids and I through somatic slow living.

The Active Stewardship Strategy: Managing Energy, Not Time

It’s not about what you have the time to do. It’s about stewarding your energy into the things that matter most.

The Rebel’s Edge: High-Intensity Mornings for High-Peace Days

A key component to living the slow life is that I actually wake up a lot earlier than I used to. This isn’t about rising early to get more done, it’s about waking up with intention to get the right things taken care of. I’m building the armor that’s going to take me through the rest of the day as a single mom. 5:00 am- 7:30 am are mine.

1. The Somatic Strike: (5:00 AM – 6:15 AM)

I wake up ready to move through a high-intensity training camp, or with my ruck session, to regulate my nervous system. Moving the built up cortisol out of my body allows me to break the “bracing” in my chest, and breathe in peace. By the time the kids wake up, I’ve already lived the hardest hour of my day.

Whenever I begin to feel selfish or self-centered about the amount of time I dedicate to physical wellness, I remember who I was six months ago without it. I’m not talking about the glute growth I’ve seen the last few months, either. I’m talking about the mental health aspect.

My kids benefit from me taking this part of my day seriously. Seriously.

2. The Sacred Bridge: (6:15 AM – 6:45 AM)

This is a sacred half hour of digital hibernation, the transition from the “grind” to the “glow.” During this time, it’s important for me to say no to any external noise, and instead choose to luxuriate in ordinary moments. It’s the simple resolve to be still so that I don’t get touched out by noon. Coffee, journaling, bible reading, box breathing… whatever supports me that day in that moment, that’s the move.

3. The Sovereign Grind: (6:45 AM – 7:30 AM)

Before I start wildschooling my kiddos, I make a move towards our future freedom. This is my dedicated time to write 500 words, whether it’s for an upcoming Honest Healing or Radical Self-Discovery post, or for my first digital product that will be on sale later this year. I’m actively moving the needle forward.

I’m not just a busy single mom. I am a cultivator.

And Sunrise and Grind isn’t just a blog, either. It’s a freedom machine, the launching point for the bigger business of helping single moms cultivate their own wild lives. It’s just the beginning to flipping the script on what life after divorce is supposed to look like.

Low-Friction Sanctuary for Single Moms: From Scratch and Without Shortcuts

Admittedly, this is more the dream and the goal than the everyday reality. These are the things that scream softly whisper slow living, to me, and signify that we’re on the right path. Everything I do in our day to day offsets the ultimate goal of relentless well-being and emotional regulation.

Slow living for single moms isn’t about moving slowly, it’s about moving intentionally. It’s making decisions that ultimately support your goals, your vision, and your values. Slow living is about cultivating a life you love and living authentically according to your own convictions.

Some examples of what slow living means for me:

1. Remove the microwave

Not only does this force intentionality in what you eat, it saves you from radio-active nonsense.

2. Stretching over scrolling

You don’t need more information and stimulation. You need joint mobility.

3. Start an herb garden

This has been on my to-do list for ages. This spring, it’s happening.

4. Holistic healing/remedies from that garden

Number 3 because this.

5. Dinners from scratch

From pizza crust to soup to bread to sweets, I’m doing my best to cut the excess junk.

6. Reading instead of television at night

Gathering together on the couch at the end of the day without sleep disrupting bluelights, that’s a win.

7. Wildschooling outside

Calling our homeschool time blocks “wildschooling” makes this adhd mom actually want to follow through and do it.

8. Adventure bags ready to go

As a type b mom, I’m either not prepared at all or I think I need to bring everything that I own. Adventure bags make a lot more sense for our family. Extra clothes, snacks, water, nature study supplies: let’s go.

9. Routines and rhythms over rigid schedules

We simultaneously crave stability and rebel against it. I like the idea of moving with flow, like a river, rather than with structure, like city streets.

10. Digital hibernation and social media limits

Being unreachable is the biggest flex. I’m definitely going to be practicing this on the regular.

11. Ruthlessly pruning your tribe.

Guarding your peace and your energy like your life depends on it, because it kind of does.

12. Boundaries and speaking up for yourself.

Slow living as a single mom means being bold enough to advocate for yourself and your children, and drawing lines in sand as needed.

Slow Living Mentality: Why I’m Content to be Unapproved

The truth is, when you become a single mom, you are automatically under the microscope. In the first place, there’s always a question over your decision to choose divorce. On top of that, your dating life is a source of disapproval, no matter how careful you are. And ultimately, if you’re too happy after completely disintegrating your family’s lifestyle, then there’s the assumption that you must have wanted it all along.

Undercurrents of opinions that have nothing whatsoever to do with who you are as a person, or a mother, or an ex-wife.

The fact of the matter is this: you are allowed to love your life even if you didn’t love the circumstances which brought you to this place in time.

As much as anyone else.

Maybe even more so.

Do the things that make your soul sparkle. I mean it, there is only so much time to celebrate being alive. Nothing in me cares about being unapproved when I’m at the top of a mountain. I couldn’t care less what anyone thinks I should do, who has not gone where I want to go. And when I’m driving in my jeep, windows down music up, I know that I’m on the road to a radical shift.

Sometimes, the things that felt like the worst-case scenario end up being the best possible catalyst to your authentic life.

I fought my battles. I’ve done my time.

Respectfully, if the way I live my life doesn’t impress you, you are free to stop watching me live it.

Cultivating the Remarkable Ordinary as a Solo Mom

Slow living didn’t begin as a luxury for me. As a single mom dealing with crippling anxiety and dealing with emotional betrayals in a handful of relationships, it was a survival strategy that soon became the anchor to our lives.

Only another single mom will know the struggle to remain feminine in the grit of handling everyday life alone.

If moms are the atmosphere of their homes, what happens when the home burns to the ground and the mom is covered in ashes?

She figures it out, that’s what. She continues to nurture, grow, rise, cultivate, and figure that ish out.

I used to truly believe the answer to the problem of my marriage ending was to find a new marriage, a new husband. Looking around me now, at this beautiful, remarkably ordinary and totally amazing life, I realized we have all that we need right here.

Because often times, the amount of lovely that’s in your life is just in your ability to see it. I didn’t set out to be a single mom, but I’ll be durned if I don’t make single momming the greatest adventure of my life.

Are you ready to reclaim your identity and cultivate your own remarkable reality?

Join the Sunrise Village and start regulating your nervous system with this 7 day cheat sheet. The greatest asset you have to make your radical lifestyle switch is you.