What is my calling in life? Does it go beyond momming? Can I have more than one?
If you’ve ever asked yourself these questions, sister, you are not alone.
It’s easy to lose yourself in motherhood when you are a new mom, or a mama with young babes.
It’s even easy to remain “lost” when you’re raising those kiddos, homeschooling, homesteading, doing all the things all the day long with these precious, awesome little beings.
So, it would make sense to say that your calling as a Christian mom begins and ends with momming.
But is that accurate?
A calling is often defined as a strong urge or desire toward a certain way of life. As a Christian mom, I know a calling to be that which God draws you toward. It’s the place where your passion meets your purpose.
It may also be where your purpose ignites your passion.
“Calling” is a total buzz word right now, so it’s maybe it’s worth thinking about and trying to understand.
I think one of the big mistakes we can make is to decide that what we most want to do is what God most wants us to do. Sure, often times, your calling is going to align with your values, your passions, and your convictions on how to live your life.
Sometimes, your calling is not necessarily the thing you would have chosen for yourself.
I mean, Moses stuttered yet God chose him to be the His voice in leading His people out of Egypt. And Exodus 3 shows us just how much Moses wanted that job. #notatall
Mary was called to be a virgin mom. And while we can all say with certainty, in our perfect 20/20 hindsight, that we would have loved to be chosen to carry Jesus… I’m not so certain in that moment, in that culture, we would have all said yes.
She was a scandal, likely ostracized for a time, and very nearly lost her engagement, but for God.
And she was probably quite embarrassed for a while.
What we desire is often in line with our calling, but sometimes our calling is not what we desire.
The very concept of a calling is that it is outside of yourself. Just like when someone calls across the room to get your attention… it’s a voice not your own, drawing you to a place you did not choose yourself, with a request for action.
A great tragedy, in my opinion and personal experience, is for a mom to decide that they have been called to momming, and that that’s where it begins and ends for them.
People have more than one calling in their life, moms included!
Why shouldn’t they?
You’ll never stop being a mom once you’ve stepped into that role, but your role changes over time. One day you’re their everything and they need you every minute of the day.
And the next? They don’t.
You won’t stop being a mom when your kids become more independent, but of course your involvement lessens. God has designed us mamas to be more than moms. I believe we are called to more.
It’s taboo to say, I know. And it goes against the grain of our heart to even suggest that our children are not what our entire existence is about.
But I think it’s time to give yourself permission to be all of you. Dads don’t stop being fathers when they go to their places of work. And we won’t stop being mothers when we pour ourselves into the other things we’ve been called to.
It’s pivotal that you don’t overthink it (says the greatest overthinker of all time).
If you’re searching out a calling for the sake of finding one, having a “calling” becomes the focus and it kind of misses the point.
It’s not about nailing down your next business endeavor or career move.
It’s that inescapable draw to do or be or create.
And while I don’t think you should go out looking for a calling, I do think that there are ways to discover if you’re already pursuing yours… or if you should pursue something specific.
The bible gives a variety of giftings that we may receive from the Spirit. We won’t all get the same one, or the same amount, but we all get every gift that we need. If you’ve never taken a spiritual gifts test, now might be a good time to do so.
I personally don’t place too much emphasis on the spiritual gift test results, because I know that I will be given what I need when I need it, if it’s in the plans for me to do it. However, knowing that I am gifted with encouragement and exhortation… it helps me make sense of what I feel led to do.
Again, you never want to speak on God’s behalf without being absolutely certain you know what you’re talking about. And I would strongly discourage you from labeling every passion a calling from the Lord.
There are hints in your passions that may present your calling more clearly.
For example: I am wildly passionate about blogging. I just love it. I love reading about it, discussing it, and doing it!
But I wouldn’t say that I’m called to blogging. Blogging makes sense for me in light of my passion, my skills and my talents, and the thing that I am called to.
Which is writing.
If my blog was shut down tomorrow, I wouldn’t feel as if I couldn’t pursue my calling. My blog is the expression of that calling, the chosen platform, the way that I desire to utilize and steward my gift of writing.
I just shared with you that I have a natural talent and affinity towards writing. I’m also a natural encourager. I abhor public speaking (feel Moses’ pain so hard!). Deep, purposeful one on one conversations are my jam, small talk is decidedly not.
I’m introverted and it’s not a personality flaw, and I don’t have natural charisma that might move a crowd.
For these reasons, I would believe that any calling of mine would capitalize on those things that I feel are a natural, deeply ingrained part of my being.
Now, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me- and there may be times when I’m called to act in a way that is counter to everything I know about myself- so I try to remain sensitive to that.
But ultimately, your in-born design is a great indicator of where God wants to lead you.
And, let’s remember, God is calling everyone of us to himself if we are remade in the image of Christ. That is where every “call on your life” should lead.
A calling might be a way of life (homesteading), a career (writing/speaking/teaching), or a one time event (sharing the gospel/reaching out to someone in need). As Christians, we all have the same general call: to be authentic followers of Jesus and to go and make disciples.
But sometimes, our current calling might feel more mundane than magical. It might be more ordinary than extraordinary.
It may be that we’ve been called to a place, not to make a difference there, but to have a difference made in us.
It’s totally counter cultural to tell you not to follow your heart wherever it may lead… but… don’t follow your heart wherever it may lead.
It’s not always right!
But neither is it always wrong.
God is the God of the universe. He can speak to us in any way that he chooses. And he can call us wherever and to whatever he desires. The very best way to approach a calling- your current one or as you seek to discover yours- is with open hands.
If you’re in a season of motherhood and there’s no more of you to give, this is your only calling right now. That’s okay. And it’s okay to be okay with that.
It doesn’t mean that you won’t be called to other things. It simply means that right now, other things will wait while you live in obedience, walking this out one day at a time.
If you’re struggling because you feel like you’re stepping out of your comfortable calling of motherhood into the unknown, understand that if it’s a calling on your life- truly– you will be equipped as you are called.
My hope is that this post inspired you to embrace your God given calling with open hands and an open heart. Don’t simply follow your dreams for the sake of dreaming, that’s basic.
And that’s not what we’re talking about here.
Encourage good, godly desires, yes.
But ultimately, decide that wherever you are called, whatever you are called to do, you will bring your whole self to it. Because stepping into your every calling with confidence and clarity is an act of worship to the One who calls.
Don’t go it alone! Join the Sunrise and Grind sisterhood by leaving your email below, so we can stay connected!
Having an identity crisis in motherhood is more common than you might expect, and choosing …September 19, 2023